The New Leader of al Quesadilla: He Knows Our Ways
[This FBI announcement uncritically repeated at 911blogger: MIAMI — A suspected al-Qaida operative who lived for more than 15 years in the U.S. has become chief of the terror network's global operations, the FBI says, marking the first time a leader so intimately familiar with American society has been placed in charge of planning attacks.]
He knows how to order at McDonald's. He knows how to ride a two-wheeler. He knows that pushing the elevator button repeatedly makes the elevator come faster, whereas pushing the crosswalk button more than once does nothing. He knows not to go to Costco around lunchtime or on the weekends.
What else?
ummm...
...pushing the crosswalk button ONCE does nothing. it's a placebo. you are so not ready to wage jihad on America, C455...
he knows...
...not to squeeze the Charmin. he knows to take the milk from the back of the rack, and check the date. he knows to decline the extended warranty. he knows you can use your phone number if you don't have your customer loyalty card handy.
He knows...
where the beef is. That "New Coke" sucked. That the crap at Macy's is ALWAYS on sale.
he knows...
...that what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. he knows who the current American Idol is. he knows to flush first, then pee. He knows to wait 6 days before calling an infidel woman he meets at a bar.
He knows who shot J.R.
and who shot Mr. Burns.
he can whistle dixie...
...AND yankee doodle, and knows in which states each is ok. he can do the macarena. he knows to say "in bed" after reading his fortune cookie. he knows what it means to get in the car Dukes of Hazard style. he knows not to make eye contact with people holding clipboards in the street.
he knows the boss...
...the king, and the chairman of the board, and who outranks whom.
He knows
when to hold them and knows when to fold them -- plus he knows when to walk away and when to run.
omg if he knows all this stuff
omg well just think of how scared we should all be now!!!
perhaps...
but you never count your money while you're sitting at the table, as Benjamin Franklin was fond of saying!
however, he WANTS to know...
...what love is. He wants you to show him.
done.
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Do these pants make my ass look big? Would you tell me if they did?
this thread is becoming quite the cheat sheet...
...perhaps we should say that this list is not intended as a study guide for wannabe jihadis (if such a thing in fact exists...)
WTCD - Always On the Up & Up
uncritically repeated
he knows that fbi propaganda will get uncritically repeated at 911blogger ... where Sunstein's little helpers are busy fermenting new views to salve the crippled epistemology of 911blogger-huggers.
Sunstein's Little Helpers...
has a nice ring to it!